sweet serendipity

        So I just signed up for driving lessons at the USJ driving school and no, its not metro. I initially wanted to sign up for metro this morning so I woke up hella early this morning so my mum could send me because she said she has to leave for work by 11:00am. According to my sister's old brosure they said metro opens at 9:00am so ok we went there at 9:30. Turns out when we arrived belum bukak and when we called they said they only opened at 10:30 -_-. By then my mum dah frustrated sangat So we decided to go the USJ branch (well at least I thought was the USJ branch). So we waited around until about 10:20 then baru bukak.So we went in and talked with the person and talked prices and all, I thought, okay, reasonable enough I decided to roll with the punches and sign up since we were running out of time(knowing my registration will be further postponed if I don't get it done now). My mum paid and we went back to the car and drove home...... On the way back she started complaining about prices and compared Metro driving academy's price to this one and started talking about how far the main driving school is (it's in Puchong) to the point that I got really frustrated. I mean, if you already knew the price for metro academy and how it runs over there why didn't you tell that to me the first place? How am I suppose to know I have an unlimited amount of computer test trials over there? Yeah, so I got so frustrated to the point that I was ready to the car's dashboard but instead I drew tears out of my eyes (because I'm so bloody sensitive).My mum saw me and she was like "why are you crying?" So I told her, then she was like "oh, I just wanted you to learn to compare, you can't do this, you have to act like an adult now, you can't cry........" That made me even more frustrated and I just kept quiet.  We arrived home, I went to the toilet to wash my face and she left for work. So now I'm here venting out my anger and frustrations.
      I can't help for being such a prissy person and it sucks that I am. It can get really frustrating all the time because whatever worry or stress a normal person feels at the time, mine will be magnified 10 times worse. I sort of gravitate towards the stressful by the way because well, that's just how it is. I really just want all of my stupid paranoia and pressure to make everyone happy to just go away and not worry about much. The only way for me to fell happy or satisfied by something is by making others feel happy even though at times the things that I do for them isn't as agreeable. I'm just really hating on a bunch of people (including myself) right now so as to make myself feel a little better, I'm gonna go make myself some spicy ramen.............Gosh I'm really PMS-sy today, and it ain't even half the day yet.................

  

Welcome to the new age....

I'm currently rereading this book again just to fill in my time.  I remembered reading it masa form 3 & it kind of changed my perspective on a lot of things. I don't recommend it to everyone since it's sort of complicated in an enlightened sense but if you're all up for it, don't let me stop you! I'm still working on my personal statement and CV for the IB schools I would like to apply for and my lovely kitties are getting better everyday.  Just so you know, a few weeks back 2 of my kittens were sick and the vet told me that one of them has leukaemia and the other one might have blood parasites.  He gave me some meds for them and they seem to be alright! Yay! Alhamdulillah... I still haven't started any driving yet though. Other than that, I'm just lazing around with my laptop and phone doing derpy things on the internet. One thing I'm pretty excited for is The Host coming to theaters soon. The Host was written by Stephenie Meyer and it's actually a really good book. I read it during form 1 while waiting for Breaking Dawn to come out. It was really different compared to the twilight series and I highly recommend this. I guess that's it. I can't blog on my laptop since there's something up with my cookies(? ) or something. .. I'm bad with technology, I know.......

New phone!!!!

Got myself this sweet new phone. !!! Sorry for my bad photography skills. :/ I'm just so god damn excited!!!! Wweee! !! It's Samsung galaxy s3 in Garnett red. In other news, nothing else happened. I haven't started any driving lessons yet and I'm just sitting at home getting fat.....

calling out for a hero

yay! SPM dah habis! Alhamdulillah I survived it!
 I'm not that thrilled as I thought I was. All my additional skills and talents I've somehow was able to develop has vanished out of thin air. I mean, I've lost my ability to read novels, I forgot how to sketch with oil pastels, I even forgot some of the sign language I've learned these past few months. This is what spm does to you. It makes you become tired, dry and dull.I was so excited for it to end but then when the time came I didn't really have the mood to celebrate :( I didn't feel like doing anything. I'm looking around for some jobs but to be  honest, I don't really want to do any work right now. My mum said if I'm going to have to keep up with my constant random impulse book buying I better get a job. I bought JK Rowling's new book today (The Casual Vacancy) and the book was like 70 ringgit! I've been trying to contact up Mr. Nicholas (my school counselor) if I could work for him at his consulting center at Kelana Jaya but apparently he hasn't replied to any of my messages yet. Maybe I should call him tomorrow...... I really would like to take some classes though but sadly it costs money and I'm short of that right now.  I don't have a lot in my mind right now so I'm just gonna end it here. I'll probably post something about my spm papers later........

Banana Shit!!!!

    So today was officially my last day in school actually learning things. This coming monday dah SPM and my insides are ready to blow up. Seriously, I don't know what to feel anymore, I am stressed, yet very calm about this whole thing. It's ironic that the last class I ever had for the year was add maths since this subject is probably my weakest amongst all. Is it a sign? I don't know 0_0 I decided to go on the internet again and browsed through ISKL's website and berangan-angan, wondering what would my life be like if I actually had the oppurtunity to go there after exams. But either way, wherever I end up, I'll still be happy irregardless because I know Allah SWT  has plans for all of us and there's always good to come of it.
   It's still very surreal to me that 5 years has just gone by like that. I admit that I regret doing some things (that I'm not exactly proud of) and not taking up on wonderful opportunities that had been practically thrown in front of me.
   So the last day of school were filled with hugs and tears (but not from 5 science 1 though, because we're all super macho awesome bitches). We took pictures and salam all the teachers asking for their blessings, the usual final day stuff. A friend of mine and I were talking, we both came to the realisation that after that final period, we would no longer be sitting in a small classroom of 25 (where everybody knows everybody) doing whatever we did for the past 11 years in there. By next year, we would all be drowning in a giant lecture hall (of course this doesn't apply for everyone) filled with probably 50-100 other people. Of course we would still have friends but it just won't feel the same anymore. Sigh, what to do? It is life after all and just like the rest, I have to learn to adapt to new things. I'm actually looking forward to that! :3

Eyes on fire

Assalamualaikum and heyyoh!!!!
SPM's near.... what's new? I am currently looking forscholarship and bursaries for pre-u program and as you know from my previous entries, I am looking forward to doing IB but y'all know that shit ain't cheap. I've been doing this for the past three days now and I've never felt so emotionally broken in my entire life. My results for my trials have been pretty okay so far (let's hope this good fortune goes smooth till the end) but applying for IB's ain't easy. I'm not talking about just the scholarships, apparently to get into that program in general is hard as it is. Other than the obvious consistent academic achievement and outstanding results in SPM and trials there's also the involvement in co-curriculum, extra corriculum, community service and etc... oh, there's also personal statements and apparently an interview before being accepted into IB. Lord knows the last thing I'm capable of doing is being good at interviews. Seriously, I am a ticking time bomb at these things. You should've seen me during my E-club interview at school o_o. (I got accepted either way, but sadly....... there is no more E-club at school :( )  I'm also looking into other options like AUSMAT and A-levels but either way I'm still going through an emotional imbalance. I've been reconsidering to go into medicine because there's this great school in Serdang called Perdana University and they have a great relationship with John Hopkins School of Medicine and Royal College of Surgeons in Ireland. Those of whom are interested in continuing their studies in medicine know that these 2 places is where you want to be. :3 I'm getting good momentum in my studies but I swear my head is just gonna blow up!!! I've been getting mixed signals from my parents recently, especially my mum. She's been asking  me to relax (because I've been very tensed )and the next second she's telling me to go revise. It's been very dangerous being around her. She said she's been very stressed lately with work and the fact that my sister hasn't been giving any signs about her university applications for the US. So because of that, not only has she been giving me weird vibes, she also is trying to keep tabs on my grades and a bunch of other SPM-related things. So, that's it, I'm late for jogging now, phew... really happy got all that out now! Bye!

I don't wanna hold I want a chocolate fountain...

Assalamualaikum and hey again,
It's been a really since I made an entry again. I just finished my trials and I can tell you right now that it didn't go very well. It went well for certain subjects but the rest, not so much. There are at least 1 month left to the big day and as usual I ain't ready yet. But I'm not gonna rant about that today to avoid myself from getting too emotional. But I'm sure I'm going to have to talk with my parents soon because I'm sure there's going to be a parent-teacher day after this. Which reminds me, I have to return back my report card to my class teacher soon 0_0. I am just really tired lately and all I want right now is something from mcdonalds, like the spicy fried chicken or something. Yeah, I guess that's it, there isn't a lot of things I could talk about today except that.......