Frito Lays (warning, emo rant)

Well, just got back on what was suppose to be my last driving lesson before I go do my test. I wish I could say it's going great but I would be lying. It seems that with every lesson I seem to have a worse experience than the last. I was able to do the bukit test with slight improvement but my parking skills are horrendous (seriously, there were other instructors laughing at me). 3 point turn took some getting use to but in the end I got the gist of it. So initially I thought if I work on it a little more I'll get it right so I was ready to return home in an okay mood. Then after dropping someone at Shah Alam, my instructor told me to takeover and drive us back to subang. That's when the real shit starts happening...

    Late turns at junctions, slow gear changing, skidding,  all sorts of driving nightmares happened. Oh, let me also add that I nearly hit someone at the highway because I had trouble slowing down! Even though I already saw the other car obviously slowing down, somehow my legs refused to do the same! My instructor was so frustrated with me and in the end he told me that he still doesn't understand how I'm still so bad at driving because usually students are already able to drive like pros by now. When we arrived at my house he saw that I was upset and he tried to nicely tell me to not be so nervous. But that just got me even more sad and frustrated because the truth is; I have no idea how to suppress it and I won't be able to figure out how to do it anytime soon.
      So I ran into my house and poured a river of tears feeling all anxious and frustrated. Feeling overwhelmed with negativity, repeatedly berzikir in hopes of drying all these tears away.

   Here's the situation, it's one thing to be told that you need extra classes for a certain SPM subject, and there's another thing to be told that you need extra lessons for driving......DRIVING!! The skill that a good majority of people above the age of 17 are already incredibly capable at by the time they start the first of ten driving lesson hours. Even my 16 year old cousin has started driving to malls by herself. This goes to show you how really slow and bad I am at adapting to things............Being incredibly anxious all the time doesn't help either. AAAAGGGHHHH!!!!! I'm so UPSET!!!!!

So yeah I guess that's my emo rant for today :/